I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police