We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Never in my life have I seen a grown ass man get on all fours and attempt to buttfuck himself with the leg of a chair. I love Vegas!
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
Randomize
