I'm way too drunk on a Sunday to handle this level of Jesus.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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