Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Randomize
