I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
ETSY JUST SENT ME AN EMAIL WITH THE SUBJECT "SUMER ROMANCE" I'M BEYOND FUCKING DONE
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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