If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
Believe it or not, that's part of the whole 'best friend' thing. It's not just yelling at me for making you leave the club early or taking the couch bc I'm doing sex while you're doing bjs.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
I have a knack for carnage and poetic language.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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