god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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