Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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