is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I think my mom's writing a book called how to fuck with your kids when you know they're high
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
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