I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
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