I heard we made out
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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