gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Randomize
