I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
i think my mom watched the whole time
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
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