Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Jesus better clutch that motherfucking wheel, then.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY TRUST IN JESUS! I'M PUTTING MY TRUST IN YOU!
Randomize
