is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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