i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Weirdest drunk sex ever. His sweat dripped into my eyeball and then he looked down and asked me why I was crying. I went with it.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
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