Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
I picked up a guy that night wearing a onesie. I kicked Xmas' ass
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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