Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Randomize