you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
yeah. i tried to refuse to leave unless the burger king himself escorted me out. that didnt fly
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