its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
19 Of The Most Epic “I Quit’ Stories Ever
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
25 People Reveal The Creepiest Kids They Went to School With
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
YOU HAVE TO STOP TELLING BARTENDERS WE DON'T HAVE MORAL STANDARDS