That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
i wish there was an iPhone app that lets you write a TeXt LiKe tHiS
dude...come out of the closet already
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
He was humming "here comes Peter cottontail" while unbuttoning his pants. Happy Easter to me
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.