i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Who wears a wallet chain?!
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Saved a second guy who was crying/on the verge of wigging out. Just call me the drug whisperer.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Randomize
