Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
so... i have a picture of you and three other girls making kissy faces at this giant stuffed banana you're holding. however, you seem to be violently screaming at it.
Those bitches did NOT have my back.
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