im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Randomize
