The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
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I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
So this is what you do on your hungover days off put your balls into an egg carton?
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
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And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
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