At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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