Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.