the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Randomize