I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
Randomize