my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Randomize
