Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
Is it bad that when someone says the phrase "helicopter dick" I immediately think of you?
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
