Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(443): View more from Maryland

and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life.

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(443): and thats when i went through the window and a shard of glass got stuck in my ass. the doctor said it was the best injury hed seen all month. i am a champion of life. http://tfl.nu/6kb7

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(203): View more from Connecticut

i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.

(813): View more from Florida

morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU

(203): View more from Connecticut

oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.

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(203): i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much. (813): morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU (203): oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor. http://tfl.nu/75bu

Replies (42) Good night (1179) Bad night (2695)
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(513): View more from Ohio

She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy

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(513): She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy http://tfl.nu/sgsn

Replies (25) Good night (886) Bad night (5144)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.

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(508): I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave. http://tfl.nu/zhay

Replies (6) Good night (1465) Bad night (3827)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.

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(978): he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted. http://tfl.nu/bshy

Replies (46) Good night (6614) Bad night (2913)
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(510): View more from California

Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.

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(510): Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it. http://tfl.nu/z26i

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out?

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(402): Do you know how disconcerting it is to hear the sound a dog makes while it drinks water and find out that it's someone eating you out? http://tfl.nu/j98q

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.

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(814): This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off. http://tfl.nu/kq64

Replies (11) Good night (690) Bad night (1102)
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(571): View more from Virginia

She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...

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(571): She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance... http://tfl.nu/5je2

Replies (3) Good night (845) Bad night (993)
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(310): View more from California

Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.

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(310): Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage. http://tfl.nu/meih

Replies (12) Good night (1951) Bad night (504)
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(707): View more from California

The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.

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(707): The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down. http://tfl.nu/oe6m

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(906): View more from Michigan

does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?

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(906): does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex? http://tfl.nu/8dql

Replies (2) Good night (614) Bad night (477)
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(405): View more from Oklahoma

We were destined to go to rehab together

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(405): We were destined to go to rehab together http://tfl.nu/ewf5

Replies (4) Good night (678) Bad night (473)
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(785): View more from Kansas

Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?

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(785): Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too? http://tfl.nu/g36a

Replies (2) Good night (617) Bad night (326)
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(337): View more from Louisiana

You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me

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(337): You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me http://tfl.nu/vlf7

Replies (2) Good night (629) Bad night (239)

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