She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
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