someone get that fucking seahorse.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
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