Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Monday funday. I brushed my teeth with antibacterial soap. hangover I did not have.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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