i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
Men with bald spots should not have mohawks. Just in case you didn't know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
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