Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brb crying the tears of my youth
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
My boss stocked the communal fridge with Gatorade. It's like he wants me to come in hungover.
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
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