So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
She is the perfect woman. She cooks, gives good head and doesn't care that I have a small penis.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work