Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
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