Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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