In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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