I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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