I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
First. I had the strength. Now. I am the death.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
