You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
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Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
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You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)