Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Randomize
