I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
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Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
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I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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