We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
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do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
The guy at the ER said it was the first time he's given stitches for a funneling accident. Then he seemed upset that I took pride in that...
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
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Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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