I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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