covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
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I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
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