but the good news is i woke up with 15 dollars in my pocket so i probably sold my phone instead of puking on it
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were high and telling me you felt like Pinocchio and that fire was bad for wood.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
Hey man, he's too drunk to remember what you said. What drugs are we buying and when should we expect them?
Randomize